Mystical Angels

I am gay and feeling stressed becasue of my parents. What should I do ?

I am 22-year-old gay man. I know I am gay since I am 6. I have come out to everyone except my parents are relatives. I have been studying in Australia for several years . Now my university semester has finished and I go back to Hong Kong (my hometown ). Recently my parents suspect I am gay. Everyday, they say a lot of words ( e.g. f*gg*t, loser,manwh0re, j*rk) when they say they suspect I am gay. " Why can't you be heterosexual ? All your cousins are heterosexual . Why can't you turn yourself into a straight man ? Where did you learn to be a gay man? In Australia ? Do people in Australia turn you gay ? " I answered. They say "Homosexuality is a disese. You need to cure it if you are really gay." I always reply " Homosexuality is not a disease " . However, my parents never listen to me and throw things at me every day ( when they are angry that I may be a gay man ) They say " Parents only offer their love to children if children promise that they'll be heterosexual in their whole life" My parents say " If you are really gay, you shouldn't go back to Australia to study after holiday. It will only make you even more gay" They say " We'll ask our fortune teller if you will be turned straight again in Australia. If he says yes, you can go. Otherwise, you must not go. Fortune teller can determine or change your sexuality Remember we sponsor you some of your school fees " They said " You gay boy have no right to go back to Australia without the permission of our fortune teller " They say all my life achievement will become zero once I confirm I am gay in front of them. They say"We invest lots of money to bring up you but now you may be a gay man. What a shame and disgrace to us and everyone.You shoul drop from school now and stay in Hong Kong.Edcuation is only for heterosexual people and what gay people can do is to find jobs" They keep on saying those things to me everyday. I feel depressed when they say I am worse than a piece of sh*t because of my gayness. Recently I've found that I am more vulnerable to cold/ flu than before. I don't know why. I've got more headache than before as well Q.1) HOW DO YOU THINK OF MY PARENTS ? DO YOU MENTALLY SUPPORT ME TO GO BACK TO AUSTRALIA AND CONTINUE MY STUDIES( I try to support myself financially in Australia ) ? Q.2) Do you think I'll be less competitve in the society if I discontiune my university studies at this stage( and find a full-time job instead) ? Q.3) I will confirm my gayness in front of my parents once I am financially independent.Do you mentally support me ? I miss my gay-friendly buddies in Australia. Unlike my parents, they are always on my side . They give me lots of emotional support

Public Comments

1. Wow, that's a lot. First of all let me say, it sounds like your parent are very traditional. So they may never accept, or approve that you are gay. But don't let this get you down. I don't think of your parents as hateful or ugly people, I understand that those are their beliefs, and just the way they have been conditioned to think. I support you doing whatever makes YOU happy, not your parents. I think if you want to continue your studies, even if it means no support from your parents, then do it. As far as your competitivenes in society, if you have the drive to do great things, you can do great things. If you decide to confirm you are gay after you have completed your studies, and you feel that is the best way to go, do it. I am one of the lucky ones who has parents that don't care as along as I am happy. If you do decide to tell your parents before and they cut you off, it's just a great opportunity for you to prove that you can be succesful and go to school, even if you are gay. I think the most important thing a person can tell their parents when they come out, is simply, "This is who I am. If you cannot accept it, I understand, but at no point in time will I be changing myself to make you happy." Because when it comes down to it, you have to make yourself happy not the others around you! Good Luck in whichever way you decide to go! I support you!